Tuesday, July 22, 2008

Do they know what they're doing to you when they tear you up inside? Do they even care? Unthinking, unfailingly. Do they know that memories bleed inside of me? Unable to clot, unable to stop the torrent of emotion that coagulates, inflates, unable to placate, initiate…a thrombus. Do they think we live in prisms of disengaged reaction? Uncoordinated…unconnected. Untouchable…just observed. Do they think transgression stays on skin, doesn’t move…doesn’t impact? As if all we had of each other was our surfaces. Maybe that is why, they stay physical, cowards, cowering, dithering in the towering immensity of internality.


But actions penetrate deeper than epidermis…rippling, spiraling into flesh. And everything internalized screams with ferocity, your actions creating a velocity that massacres the membranes of memories, rips them open…ready to attack, to ransack the beautiful order of rapturous remembrance. The heaving heart can only cause a tear to stream down the cheek...it is misunderstood because it is hidden, forbidden to loiter on sleeves. Tearing up, tearing me down, the oceans inside need prey to drown.

4 comments:

ceraye said...

omg the last line is amazing! mind-boggling!! love it girl! theres juz so much depth n truth in it, i relate...love it so much! ok shall stop gushing lol

Varaidzo1 said...

thanks a million girl. I hope esp it means smth to you, as I was thinking about central situations to us while writing!

Anonymous said...

You know what, I LOVE how you use technical science terms!

epidermis, mitosis, etc!

It's awesome.

I also absolutely agree that the last line is BEAUTIFUL.

Remember how I loved (and still do) oxymorons back in high school? I get the same feelings when I read your writings. I wish I know how to describe it, but it's as if the words come from all directions, but are unified into a meaning.

Varaidzo1 said...

thank u so much jules...yes, i've taken to using technical terms in my writing, i really love doing that.

haha yeah oxymorons, i love them too. i love ur description though..."words come from all directions, but are unified into a meaning"

seriously GIRL..get back into writing!